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the what and the who

Posted on June 06 2015

This is the time in our lives to consider what and who is really important.

How many times a day, a week, or even a month do you stop and think about what this life holds for you?

So many days we spend wasted, taking life and people for granted and falling asleep with the naïve comfort that, of course, we’ll wake up the next morning. It is never a guarantee that tomorrow you will see the light of day.

What do you want to see when you look back on your life? Whether it’s a short existence of 25 years or a long life of 80, what do you aim to have achieved, felt, seen, accomplished, overcome? We spend too much time waiting for our life to start, losing sight of the fact that we’re already living it. We expect that the goals we want to achieve will happen on their own, in time, and without us making them happen ourselves.

How many times have you passed up what was probably a once in a lifetime opportunity, telling yourself that the chance will surely present itself again eventually? How often do you refrain from speaking your mind, saying what you feel, doing what you want, or walking away from what you don’t want? We always say, “In time” – these things pass in time, these things happen in time, these things take time. Who are we to say that we even have any time at all, or to waste the time that we’ve been given like this? What is really important?

We must be happy, and we must work hard to obtain that happiness. We must learn and try new things, see the world, break out of our little bubbles and move beyond the looking glass. In 50 years, if you succeed at making it that far, you’re not going to care about that $600 jacket, that night you went out to the same old bar in the same old town with the same old people, or that tiny argument you started over nothing just to create some excitement. What really matters? Not the cars, the money, and the things – it’s about the moments, the feelings, and the people.

Who is important? Who is there at your side when you’re experiencing the what? Who treats you the way you deserve to be treated, and who do you treat the same way? Who do you have nothing bad and wasteful to say about? Cherish them. It’s time to filter through the what and the who. Forget about the people that don’t treat you right, who you walk away from feeling worse than you did in the first place and who force you to question your worth and abilities. Forget about the people who don’t have your best interests at heart, who waste their time and yours when they are incapable of being happy for others and are unable to see you for all that you are or can be. Forget about the people who love to talk but never to listen, who pass judgment but never offer suggestion, and who are selfish but never compassionate - the people who you always walk away from with things left unsaid. Forget about the people who you don’t trust, who talk to you about others and in that talk to others about you, and who make you think twice before you speak because you wonder how safe your expression is. Forget about the people who forget about you, who you’re still thinking about long after they’ve stopped showing evidence of caring about you, who never ask questions and who believe you when you say you’re okay. Forget about the people who you don’t enjoy, who don’t make you laugh and scream and see the world and yourself in a better and greater light, who don’t make you feel.

Don’t waste your time or that of another, always say what you want, speak on how you feel, and be whoever you desire to be. This is our life and it is our only one. At the end of the day, there are no players and there is no game. There is no status, no rules, no winners, no losers. It's all about you - making the most out of what's in front of you and creating for yourself what isn't already there.

This life will only go as far as you take it, and will only ever be what you make it. So, let's all become the people that we don't want to forget about and live the kind of life that we willalways feel good about when the sun sets.


Anja Spears


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